One of the fics from my debut fanfiction novella, Don’t Get Caught.
Sabriel, Destiel, Sassy!Cas
Sam lay awake in his bed, too excited to sleep. He rolled over and watched the love of his life snore away as if it were just any other night. That didn’t surprise him–the trouble-maker could sleep through anything. Once, they went to a rock concert for Sam’s birthday–after Gabriel’s question of ‘what do you mean you’ve never been to a concert?’ had cemented them going–and halfway through it, Sam had asked him something only to find he was snoring away as if he were at home.
Sam never understood how the ball of energy was always falling asleep at the drop of a hat. Movies, sure, the giant understood falling asleep there–it’s dark and the chairs are comfortable–but a concert?
I guess some things will just always be a mystery, he sighed, rolling onto his back to stare at the ceiling.
He knew that for tomorrow to arrive faster he should really be sleeping–no one wants to look tired on their wedding day–but he just couldn’t seem to calm down enough to rest. His eyes wandered lazily over the familiar outline of the room–the pictures of them together, the dresser, and then there was his suit hanging on the closet door handle.
He couldn’t wait to wear it. Gabriel was going to go nuts over it. He’d been careful not to put it out until after he’d fallen asleep to ensure he wouldn’t sneak a peek. Sam’s eyes ran over his fiancée’s sleeping form with a smile. He couldn’t seem to quell the butterflies that were working themselves up from his stomach and made him tingle all over when he thought of seeing his face light up when he walked in with it on.
*****
“Sammich!”
The six-year-old’s head shot up, half-fearful eyes searching for the source of the voice. He finally spotted the mop of hair bouncing towards him and groaned, Why does he always call me that? It’s not like he hated Gabe, the kid was just super annoying. He was always getting into trouble trying to be funny and Sam didn’t understand where this newfound fascination with him had come from or why. They were practically from different planets–Sam paid attention and did his work and listened to the teacher and Gabe just…. didn’t.
“Hey, Sammy! Why didn’t you sit next to me on the bus?” Gabe pulled a lollipop out of his mouth with a slurp to inspect it.
“I guess I didn’t see you,” Sam didn’t look up from his colouring. Maybe if he didn’t make eye contact, he’d go away.
“You didn’t see me?” Gabe’s head snapped up and he lost his grip on the slobbery lollipop stick, “Awww, man…” It hit the ground with a wet smack. “Grrr… That was my favourite flavour in the whole world!” Gabe pouted and dragged a chair over, “Big dope. I was waving my arms around like this,” demonstrating by waving his arms wildly above his head.
San shrugged, “It’s not my fault you’re short,” trying to hold back a laugh at how stupid he looked.
Gabe flopped his arms back down and plopped himself down in the chair next to Sam, clearly not through bothering him. He hated playtime. It wasn’t fair. They said to play however they wanted, but he always got in trouble for ‘being too noisy’ or ‘being too violent’. They were stupid rules. You shouldn’t tell people to do whatever they wanted if you were just going to yell at them later for doing it, Grown-ups…
That’s why he invented a new game. He was going to get Sam to be his friend.
Sam was the best-behaved–and most boring–kid in the class. It would be fun to see how the teacher would react seeing the best and worst kids in class hanging out together. He was a weirdo, though. The kid almost never spoke, Seriously weird. He’s got like, no friends. Besides the kids who ask him stuff, ’cause of his big, stupid brain. But he never goes to their house. Or plays with them. Or anything. He always just sits there in the corner and colours. The whole time!
Sooo weird… Gabe took it upon himself to teach Sam how to use his playtime effectively. And he knew he was actually helping out the teacher with Sam. He’d overheard her talking about his ‘under-developed social skills’ when he ‘went to the bathroom’ during library. He figured if he could help Sam be more outgoing or at least give him a friend, it’d help get the teacher off his back.
He looked around at the other kids, all of them in groups of two’s or three’s talking excitedly or laughing really loud–and then there was him and Sam, sitting in silence. He shook his head and watched him colour. That just wasn’t what playtime was for.
“Do you want to play with me?” Gabe wiggled his eyebrows.
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Because you’ll get me in trouble.”
“You don’t know that,” Gabe pouted and crossed his arms over his chest.
“Uh, yeah, you will.”
“Shows what you know,” Gabe stuck out his tongue and stuffed crayons into his pants’ pockets. “We only get in trouble if we get caught.”
*****
Cas consulted his clipboard, Room… two-thirty, two-thirty, two-thirty… Wait, they’re both in room two-thirty? Hesitating in front of the closed elevator doors, he peered down the halls to his left and right, eyes narrowed. This can’t be right… Cas growled in frustration, “I don’t have time for this, people!”
“Call front desk extension, Baret Hotel,” he enunciated carefully for the talk-to-dial and a moment later connected with the front desk clerk.
“I’m the wedding planner for the Winchester Wedding party. I’m looking for the room of one of the guests in our party. The groom, actually. I have noted that his partner, Sam Winchester, is in room two-thirty. But the groom’s room is also two-thirty? This wasn’t for the honeymoon, they weren’t supposed to be in the same room.”
The front desk clerk looked up the information while he waited on hold with growing impatience. Gabriel had said it was an emergency and he needed to hurry, Oh-Em-Gee… Did he just put me on hold? Didn’t I just say I was the wedding planner? If this glorified secretarial school drop-out delays the ceremony with his incompetence, I swear to Liza Minnelli I’ll dump a bottle of Egalite on that snow white Persian carpet in the lounge as a permanent reminder not to mess with the clipboard!
The desk clerk came back on the line. Did I say Egalite? Psh, no-no-no, he’s not worth wasting a bottle of good sparkling wine on. I’ll use Merlot. Those bitches will never get that stain out. Cas smirked in mental triumph and looked up at the wall on either side of the elevator, nodding his head as the desk clerk explained the hotel layout, “I see them,” and noted the brass signs with the names of the wings of the hotel. “I see… Horizon and Morning Star. Wait, the room numbers are the same in either wing?”
Cas rolled his eyes, “If I might make a suggestion, honey? If you want your future guests to find their way around your establishment, you may want to rethink your naming convention so anyone with a rudimentary reading comprehension can find their own way around.” He severed the connection with a huff, “The smartest thing that ever came out of that boy’s mouth was probably a penis.”
With a glance back up a the directional signs, Cas ran down the Horizon Wing to the end suite.
“What’s the big emergency?” Cas burst into the room.
“I can’t tie this friggin’ tie!” Gabriel tugged at it in frustration.
“That’s it?” Cas raised an eyebrow, but went to help him anyway.
“Yeah, that’s it! Was this thing designed by NASA or something?” Gabriel grumbled.
“Stop, you’re making it worse,” Cas slapped his hands out of the way. “What in the name of Barbra Streisand did you do to this thing? How could you have known me this long and not know how to properly tie a tie?”
“Sammy’s been doing my ties since prom,” Gabriel confessed with a blush.
Cas chuckled and shook his head, “Of course, he has.”
*****
“Sammich!”
Sam’s head whipped up at the sound and he bounded down the stairs half-dressed, almost beating Dean to the door.
“Whoa! Where’s the fire?” Dean leaned all his weight against the door before Sam could open it.
Sam groaned, “Dean, c’mon!” He worked to get around his older brother to pull it open with no luck.
“Why’re you in such a hurry? You’re not even dressed.”
“We’re getting ready together,” Sam explained with a huff.
“Oh, I’m sure you are,” Dean winked.
“Ew, Dean! Gross!”
“Guess you’ve still got a few more years for that to be embarrassing… Unless tonight’s the big night…” Dean laughed suggestively.
“Dean!” Sam grunted, tugging on the door handle again. “Let him in!”
“Tonight’s the big night for what?” John came around the corner into the front hall to see what the boys were fighting about. This time.
“Oh great…” Sam rolled his eyes.
“Dean, let the kid in, it’s freezing outside,” John glowered at his eldest.
Dean took his time moving off the door and sauntered over to stand beside his father. Sam wrenched the door open and had it closed again with Gabriel squished to his chest in the same instant.
“Whoa, Sammy. You miss me or something?” Gabriel hugged him back.
“I haven’t seen you all semester!” Sam squished him closer.
“I know, I missed you, too.”
“You’re cold.” Sam nuzzled his head into his chest.
“It’s cold outside,” he replied with a chuckle.
“Aw, aren’t they adorable?” Dean broke in, smiling as the teenagers jumped apart.
The look of embarrassment on Sam’s face seemed satisfactory enough for him, because he just winked again before leaving.
“Why don’t you two go finish getting ready?” John suggested, much to Sam’s relief.
Sam nodded shyly and dragged Gabriel up the stairs two at a time, not letting go of him until they were in his room with the door closed.
“Damn, Sam, you’re sure eager,” Gabriel plopped himself down on his bed.
“No. I just don’t want you to have to endure my family,” Sam shrugged off the comment and grabbed his blazer off the doorknob.
“I’m sure they’re not that bad.”
“Oh trust me. They’re that bad.”
“All right, I suppose you know them better.”
“Yep.”
Gabriel watched Sam continue to get ready in mild fascination. For someone who always seemed so well-organized, he rushed around his room throwing clothes everywhere like every other person Gabriel had met, himself included, I guess as long as he looks okay at the end, it doesn’t matter. Sam was standing in front of the mirror picking at strands of his hair.
“Are you ready?” Sam’s eyes flicked up to look at his reflection in the mirror.
“Yeah.” Gabriel stood up and gave him a twirl.
“You don’t have your tie on.” Sam frowned, turning around to examine him better.
“Oh, right well… I just figured I already looked awesome without it. Putting it on wouldn’t be fair to the other kids,” Gabriel rubbed a guilty hand across the back of his neck and avoided Sam’s eyes.
“Gabriel…”
“Fine! Fine. I, uh… don’t know how to tie it.” Gabriel pinned his gaze to the floor.
“What?”
“I just, I don’t know. I’m not really the fanciest dresser. It’s never come up before,” Gabriel crossed his arms over his chest.
“Do you have it?” Sam went to Gabriel’s rescue.
Gabriel nodded and took the crumbled piece of fabric out of his pants pocket, holding it up in shame. Sam took it delicately and flicked it, somehow getting the wrinkles out before throwing it around his neck and beginning to tie it.
“How do you know how to tie one?”
Sam shrugged, “Dean taught me.”
“Dean doesn’t seem the type to wear a tie, either.”
“He’s not, but he said ‘it’ll come in handy’. And that ‘a real man knows many things, even if he doesn’t always need them’.”
“So, I’m not a real man then?”
“Not until tonight,” Sam winked with a laugh.
“S-Sam! You just made your first dirty joke!” Gabriel wrapped him up in a hug. “I’m so proud of you!”
“Yeah-yeah it’s sooo exciting.”
“But it is! Oh, Sammich, you don’t know how much this means to me. After all this time, so many years, I’ve finally taught you something!” Gabriel gushed and squeezed the giant tighter.
“Okay-okay you taught me something. Now get off me!”
*****
“There. Better?” Cas took a step back to examine his handiwork.
Gabriel ran an appreciative hand down the tie, “How does everyone else know how to do this but me?” He turned left and right to check himself from all angles in the mirror.
“You must’ve missed the meeting. There was a bulletin about it and everything,” Cas smoothed Gabriel’s shirt collar down over the tie around his neck.
“They should really send e-mails out, I’m telling you!” Gabriel flicked lint off his blazer and tugged on the lapels a bit to settle it against his shoulders more securely.
Cas took an appreciative step back, “You look good enough to be seen in public with me.”
“Oh, puh-leeze…” Gabriel smirked. “You wish you looked this good. Hell, everyone wishes they looked this good. Okay,” he clapped both his hands together in expectation, “let’s light this candle. Before something happens.”
Cas rolled his eyes. “Keep the pony in the corral, Mary. Now,” he turned on his heel, “if you have no more emergencies, I’ll get back to running the wedding. Apparently everyone else was dropped on their head as a child and is incapable of making a decision without me.”
“If I look this good,” Gabriel ignored his brother, “then Sam… Oh!” He put his hand over his heart, “Be still my heart. That gorgeous hunk of burning love…” He turned himself left and right again to make another examination of his outfit. Cocking his head to one side, he got a better view of how perky his ass looked in his suit pants and then checked-out his reflection head-on. He put his hands on his hips, “I wonder if Rough Rider makes flame-retardant condoms?”
*****
“You rang?” Dean asked with a smile as he let himself through the hotel suite door.
He looked around with a frown–there were clothes thrown all over the place, and Sam was in the closet throwing more out onto the ground. And he was still in a tank and boxers.
“What the hell, man. You’re not dressed yet? We’re supposed to start in a half-hour.”
“Dean! My life’s over. It’s not here!” Sam gestured to the clothes on the ground, his eyes wild.
“…What’s not here?”
“My tux! You know, the one Gabriel had made for me. For our wedding,” Sam raked his fingers through his hair in agitation. “I know I packed it into the truck we sent ahead. It was in the black suit bag. It had a giant label that I wrote ‘Sam’s tux – do not touch’ on with a Sharpie just to make sure we could find it. But it’s not here!” Sam spun back around to throw more clothes on the ground.
“I’m sure it’s here somewhere. We just gotta look for it. Okay?” Dean put his hands on his brother’s shoulders in reassurance. “Just calm down. I’ll help. I mean, how far could it go. Not like it grew legs, right?”
“Gabriel was so sweet. He booked me time in the spa. You should really go down there, by the way.” He stopped whining momentarily to give his brother an aside about the spa,”I had one of those Rosemary Mint Awakening Body Wraps, y’know? I never knew peppermint could be used like that. Go ahead feel my skin. Seriously, touch it,” he shoved his arm in front of Dean’s face. “By the time I was done the ninety-minute Thai Massage, I was so relaxed. All I wanted to do was get dressed. And now I can’t find my tux,” Sam fanned himself. “This can’t be happening. How could this have happened? I can’t get married in my underwear!” Sam wailed, collapsing in a heap on the ground, holding his head in his hands.
“Whoa, hey… Relax, little brother. Don’t go all drama queen on me now,” Dean held his arms out in front of himself and made a calming gesture in Sam’s direction.. “Look, just stay there. Don’t worry about a thing. I’m the best man. I’m the guy who has your back. I’ll go look for it, okay? I’ll ask Cas. Cas will know. He knows everything,” Dean assured him on his way out of the room
“I don’t know…” Sam looked up with tears in his eyes, “Dean, what if he lost it?”
“You’re kidding, right? This is Cas we’re talking about. There’s no way Cas lost your tux. He loves that thing possibly even more than you do. Seriously, we’ll find it.” Dean assured him before disappearing out the door in a hurry.
I hope.
*****
“Cas!” Dean yelled for his boyfriend. He caught sight of him disappearing into the reception hall. “Marco!”
“Polo-o-o!” Cas sang out and stuck his pen in the air to signal his location. “Can it wait? Kinda busy, hon,” Cas barely looked up from his clipboard as he strode into the room.
“It really can’t,” Dean ran up to him and pecked him on the cheek. “We have a problem.” He put a hand on his arm to get his attention. “Listen, Sam can’t find his tux,” he told him in a lowered tone.
“You shut your mouth,” Cas’s jaw bulged as he clenched his teeth and stopped dead in his tracks. He skewered him with a withering look, “That’s not funny, babe.”
“Well, I was just in his room. He tore the place apart. Aaand it’s not there.”
“No-no, that’s impossible. I had it sent up to his room personally. It has to be in there. I already checked it off the to-do list.” Cas flipped back a few pages on his clipboard and tapped at a line with the tip of his pen.
“I don’t know what to tell you, man, but it’s not there.” Dean shrugged.
“No, see? It’s the very first thing I did when we arrived. ‘Item 1: Deliver Sam’s tux to his room, Room 230,’” Cas read, tipping the clipboard to show the taller man.
“Please, don’t take my head off, but… are you sure?” Not prone to drama, even Dean was starting to panic. He didn’t want to see the day ruined for his little brother.
“You dare question me? Oh, honey. I had it delivered to room two-thirty, Morning Star, as soon as I got here,” Cas mumbled, looking back over his notes.
“Wait, two-thirty? No, that’s not right. Sam’s in room two-thirty.”
“Right. And Gabriel’s in room two-thirty. But in the other wing. I know because I’m the one who booked the rooms. There’s two wings, Horizon and Morning Star, and the room numbers are the same,” he held up a hand before Dean could say something. “Don’t even. I know. I already had this conversation with the desk clerk,” he rolled his eyes. “Gabriel needed a room on the west side, because none of the east side rooms have enough windows. They were further apart, but at least I didn’t have to deal with Gabriel having a claustrophobic panic attack. I have enough to worry about, y’know.”
Dean threw his hands in the air and pulled a face, “Well, whatever, okay? It’s on the list, but I just came from Sam’s room and I’m telling you, it’s not there. He’s still standing around in his underwear.” Dean crossed his arms. “Ideas?”
Cas closed his eyes and rubbed at his temples with the tips of his fingers, “I smell burnt toast. Does anyone else smell that?” Cas dropped his hands from his temples, “The delivery driver had one job. One job. Did they not give him a map of this establishment? What did I pay him for? Let that be a lesson to you. Never tip until after you see the goods.”
“Cas, focus. You said their room numbers are the same, right? Maybe it’s not lost. What if… What if the courier just got the wings wrong and it’s just in Gabriel’s room?” Dean said with hope.
“No, I don’t think so,” Cas grumbled.
“Don’t be so negative. Why?”
“Because I only saw one tux in Gabriel’s room and he was wearing it.”
“So, you think he’s wearing Sam’s tux? Seriously. And you wouldn’t have noticed this? Remind me to take you to the eye doctor.” Dean gave him a wink, “Sam’s must be there.”
“You think?”
“Yeah, I’m sure it was just an honest mistake with the wings and everything. I’ll go check it out and we’ll get it all sorted out and everything will be fine.”
“Honest mistake, my sweet ass,” Cas grumbled
Dean took him by the shoulders and leaned in close to his ear, “And speaking of your sweet ass, will I get to see that later?”
“Dean, focus,” he pushed him off him with a smile. “You, go. I have a million and one things to do in the next,” Cas pulled out his iPhone and check his itinerary, “twenty-four minutes and counting.”
Dean grimaced, “I don’t suppose there’s a way to delay this a bit?”
Cas gave him the Look-Of-Death.
“Ooo-kay then. I’ll just run back up, grab the tux from Gabriel’s room, get Sam into it and we’re golden,” he clapped his hands together.
“Move it, Mister,” he pointed him toward the door. “We’re burning daylight!”
“Next time, I get to plan and you get to run around looking for your little brother.”
Cas looked down his nose at him in judgement, “Honey, I love you, but you couldn’t plan a peanut butter sandwich without me.”
Dean was already heading out of the reception hall and called over his shoulder, “The one time I forgot to pick up peanut butter… You’re never gonna let that one go.”
“Hurry!”
“Don’t tell me what to do!”
“I’m the wedding planner!” Cas hurled at his retreating back.
Damn it!
*****
“Gabriel, you decent?” Dean called, knocking on the door.
“Gabriel?” He called again after a moment of silence.
He opened the door and stuck his head in, scanning the room for the trouble-maker, but not finding him. A man on a mission, he let himself in and hurried to the closet to look for Sam’s suit. “Gabriel?” He called over his shoulder while he dug around, “Dude, quit playing around.”
After not finding the suit with Gabriel’s other clothes, he took a tour of the room. It wasn’t that big, there were only so many places the suit could be. When it became clear it wasn’t there, he stopped in the centre of the room with his hands on his hips. Now he had two problems. The groom was missing. “Fuck,” he hung his head in defeat. “Cas’s is gonna kill me.”
He pulled out his phone with a heavy sigh, “How’s my favourite wedding planner?”
“What?”
“We have another problem.”
“No.”
“Cas…”
“Fine. What is it now.”
“Uh, I can’t find Gabriel.”
Will they find Gabriel? What about Sam’s tux? Is the wedding ruined? Find out how it ends here!